My husband helps me not extend myself too far. I’m really not aware of my limits and without him I’d be a basket case. He’s helped me say ‘no’, when I’ve wanted to say ‘yes’.

Like many authors, writing is a need and a release for me. But when life gets in the way, I will put it aside and say to myself, “Nope, didn’t get to it today. But I will get to it tomorrow no matter what!” Which is why I’m writing this the day after my surgery. Not being a procrastinator helps. If I was one, this way of thinking wouldn’t work. Well, either that or I’m a workaholic. HHhhhmmm… maybe?

Becc

Of course, reality smacked the crap outta me and that didn’t happen. I have, however, managed to arrange my life in such a way that my writing is a priority. I have all sorts of portable devices so that I can write anywhere. I don’t get involved in things that I don’t *need* to be directly involved in. I hired a maid, I make enough money in the day job to not have to worry about cooking (we eat out a lot), and I’ve scheduled the day job so that I can literally take one and a half days off during the week so that I can write. On those days that’s all I do. No appointments, no calls, no nothing. The rest of the time, I snatch moments when I can, and devote my time to work, family, etc.

One of the first things I told John when we first met was that I *need* to write. It’s not a hobby, it’s not a past time. It’s not something that I’m mildly interested in. It’s something that I *must* do, else you won’t like me very much. I guess he figured I was worth the “sacrifice.” LOL

You all are great. I appreciate your views.

~Bryl

I have to avoid the “small erosions” Mr. Meeker referred to. They can quickly add up to a big one. I have a set amount of time to be on the Internet a day, and where I end up, like here, is where I end up. I just go with it. I meet a lot of people that way.

Yes, life events disrupt my writing routine. Yes, my relationships take loving attention and energy. But I’ve learned to say no to the optional distractions – at least most of the time.

I’ve found that if I say no to the unnecessary ones, I have both time to write and time for my family. It strikes me it’s the small erosion that does the most damage to my writing. Learning to say no to them is hard, but everyone around me learns about my commitment to writing from my example.

As a young woman with all the kids at home and a job, I remember burning the candle at both ends, not having enough hours in the day to do everything that needed done, and going for weeks and months with no more than an hour or two of sleep each night. While getting older takes me one step closer to the grave with each passing day, it has also lifted many of the burdens.

The best advice I can give is this: each chapter of your life will someday close and then open to a new chapter, so enjoy the one you’re in while you’re in it. Deadlines can be missed, the house doesn’t have to be cleaned everyday, the dishes don’t have to be washed right now, and it’s okay to feed the kids cereal for supper once in a while. You will wake up one day to find the kids are all gone and your time with them will seem like no more than a blink of the eye. Life is what you make of it, so live it one day at a time and enjoy those little moments as they come, because one day they will all be memories of when you were young.

But for events and such… I try to do only a certain number a month especially when hubby is gone. Yes, I feel guilty but when my health is bad (I have Lupus) I know I’d be worthless at an event, but when my boys are cuddled around me I feel loved rather than guilty.

Yes, it’s a never ending battle.